I asked around for donations to a family with little kids who I know were having a hard time. I got an outpouring of support, and people gave a turkey, canned goods, toys for christmas, clothing, and gift cards. Great! The problem is, I never consulted the mom, and I don’t want to offend her. I had been planning to do a "drop and run", but there is too much valuable stuff to leave out front. How should I get this to her without offending her?
Just tell them what a special family they are and you want them to have the best.I think they’ll be so grateful that you’ve thought of them in this way and be relieved their children won’t starve.Well done you!
December 29th, 2009 at 8:34 pm
Do the right things for the right reasons.
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December 29th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
If they’re really having that hard of a time, I doubt it will matter much how you drop it off, although I would make it clear that I haven’t been blabbing about their situation all over town, if you know what I mean and it comes up. No one wants it broadcast that they’ve fallen on hard times. If it was me in your situation I would call her up and say, "Hey Mary! I have a few things that I wanted to drop off for you and your family. When is a good time to stop by?" and leave it at that. If she asks where the stuff came from, I would just say some friends got together to purchase a few things for them to extend the meaning of the season or something similar. Its a wonderful thing you’ve done. Merry Christmas.
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Experience on the receiving end.
December 29th, 2009 at 9:10 pm
Knock on the door, when she answers say,"Merry Christmas" and leave it at that.
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December 29th, 2009 at 9:45 pm
I think that you should just go to the door, explain your situation to her, and just hand it over! I mean, if they are that troubled, I’m sure she would appreciate anything or any help. And, if she does seem like she is going to be offended when you are talking to her, just explain that you don’t mean for it to be like that. I’m sure it will be a great christmas suprise for her.
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December 29th, 2009 at 10:35 pm
Don’t leave it without speaking with her- if food just "appears" she may not trust that it is safe to feed her family with.
I think the best thing to do is to call her, ask her if you can pop by for a few. Explain that you (and many other loving families) understand what a tough time can be like and that you have a gift for their family.
Let her know the only expectation is that she passes this feeling and love on when they are on their feet once again. Wish her a VERY Merry Christmas and let her know you’d like to have hem for coffee and dessert sometime in the future. That way, it’s being part of the community rather than just dropping off "charity" .
What a nice thing for your all to do!!
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December 29th, 2009 at 10:50 pm
Wrap the gifts for the kids first off and then go over there tell her that you have some gifts for her kids and then go back to the car & get the food and tell her that you have some stuff for her too. Tell her what a wonderful person you think she is and you wanted her & her family to have nice Christmas. Flattery will get you around the charity case she may think she is. In this case I would almost say take the credit most of the things you bring over. Don’t embarass her with the fact you may have ran your mouth about her situation around town.
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I love your heart I like doing the same thing for people too.
December 29th, 2009 at 10:56 pm
When she answers the door (or whoever answers the door) say "Santa left these with me and asked me to deliver them to you, he was in a hurry and couldn’t bring them in person."
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December 29th, 2009 at 11:28 pm
I might not mention the fact that you solicited donations for her family, but other then that be truthful.
I (we, whatever) wanted to do something nice for you this tough holiday season and came up with this crazy mish mash of stuff! I hope you can put it to good use either in your home, or you can give it to someone else you feel deserves it! Merry Christmas – change the subject/leave
That’s how I would do it, particularly as that way doesn’t scream ‘you need charity’ by adding ‘the someone else you know who may need it" bit.
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December 29th, 2009 at 11:35 pm
If they’re really having that hard of a time, they are going to be GRATEFUL… not insulted. I think you’re projecting… giving should feel a lot better than you’re making it out to be.
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December 30th, 2009 at 12:00 am
Just tell them what a special family they are and you want them to have the best.I think they’ll be so grateful that you’ve thought of them in this way and be relieved their children won’t starve.Well done you!
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